Many people think of themselves, whether they intend to or not, as being at the center of the universe. With this thought process, when anything goes wrong you will look at your situation as if the world is out to get you. If you look at it reasonably though, you’d realize that this is not the case. In fact, it doesn’t care about you at all. The world doesn’t care about your awkward encounter. The world doesn’t care that you were late on your last bill. The world doesn’t care that you were scolded or corrected. The world could care less if you existed. The world could care less if you lived, or if you died. The world could care less if you succeed or if you fail. Simply put, you don’t matter. This may seem like a grim way to look at things, but actually it is one of best ways to look at life. It frees you from yourself. You will stop looking at yourself as if you are the only person who matters; as if you are the only person who feels. 

If you have ever felt that the world is out to get you, you wouldn’t have been the only one to ever think this. In fact, millions, if not billions of people before you have thought the same thing. We freak out after an awkward confrontation. We think our life is over as soon our phone dies, or we spill our morning cup of coffee. We feel bummed out whenever someone tells us we did something wrong or not quite good enough. However, in reality, we shouldn’t feel any of these things. Sure, it’s natural to feel these emotions after such encounters, but they are highly unproductive, and don’t help us become better people. What would help us become better and more productive is using these experiences to learn.

Learn from your mistakes, and the mistakes of others. Doing this is what will make us better people, not pouting to your best friend because Jessie called you a mean name. Why was your newest encounter awkward? Why did you drop your phone? How did you end up spilling your morning cup of coffee?

Why did you mess up?   What did you do wrong?   How can you be better?

These questions are the ones that will help you improve. Whining about your problems and feeling like your life is over won’t.

After you learn what you did wrong, build the habits necessary to prevent those mistakes in the future. Talk like a normal human being. Put your phone in your pocket while walking around. Pay more attention to where you’re walking so you don’t trip on that curb again and spill your beloved coffee, or move it away from the edge of the desk so you don’t bump it off while reaching for your pen. 

While these situations are minor and insignificant, these questions can be applied to almost any situation. After asking yourself how or why something bad happened and taking action to prevent whatever situation you found yourself in, you’ll be less likely to have it happen again, bringing you one step closer to living your best life.

Live Intentionally: A 90 day Self-Project

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